


Home Sea

by CreekTerrarium



Series: One-Shots [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Freeform, Gen, Partial-canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-01-01
Packaged: 2018-03-04 18:09:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3079292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CreekTerrarium/pseuds/CreekTerrarium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Killian Jones was a child once. But by no means was he an ordinary one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home Sea

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to Halle (aka swanshooknbug.tumblr.com) who provides constant reminders that I need to finish writing. Without her, this one-shot would've never been completed. Any mistakes are my own.

_A child of the ocean and seas_

_In a kingdom where one can always be free,_

_Was born during the darkest night,_

_And the full moon shone bright_

_The crashing waves calmed at his cries,_

_Soothing his soul with the gentle tides,_

_Which carried him to the golden sand,_

_To the sister kingdom known as land._

They lived in a small wooden cabin by the sea, unkept and lacking a woman's touch. Killian Jones was a boy of five, hair as dark as the night and eyes always wide and bright, taking in the world around him with curiosity. His father was a man that could rival the gods, or at least in the eyes of his youngest son. His brother Liam had dreams of greatness, wanting to serve in the navy and bring honour to their family. Killian's dreams weren't so complicated. All he wanted was to be happy with his family, to be free. After all, he was only a child and what did he know of cruel reality?

Then one day his father didn't come home. Instead, a strange man came to their front door to say that they've taken him far away for doing terrible things. They said that he had stolen, injured and even killed. Killian knew that the man must be lying. He just had to be. His father would never do such a thing! His father loved them, protected them! The father he knew was a good man who would never hurt anyone without good reason. But who was he to argue? He was a child and who would ever listen to a child?

He remembered his brother standing stoically, head bowed but refusing to let any tears fall. He didn't realise it then but that was the day his big brother became a man. That he had to become a man. It was the day Liam vowed that he would never let anything happen to his baby brother; the only family he had left.

~o0o~

His brother was out again and Killian was home alone, again. His brother didn't play with him anymore. He would beg and plead with his brother but every time he was turned down. Liam said he was too old to play, too busy to play, and that playing was for little boys.

So Killian would spend day after day alone at home. The place that was once filled with so much happiness and love now seemed so cold. Sometimes he wanted to run far away, away from this place that he hated because everything he loved about it was gone.

And one day he did just that. His brother got so terribly angry at him for fighting with the boys down the street and Killian had come home battered and bruised. It wasn't Killian's fault! They had laughed and teased him, telling him that their father was a bad man and was never coming home. He just wanted to defend their family's honour. Wasn't that what Liam would've done? But apparently that was the wrong thing to do. He had told them that his father loved his brother and him, and was a good man no matter what anyone said, and that he was a liar.

True, he threw the first punch.

And there were three of them and one of him.

But why was Liam yelling at him and not those rascal boys?

So the next day when Liam went off to do 'important adult things' Killian packed his few belongings in a satchel and marched down to the beach. Tied to a post that stuck out of the stand was a little wooden boat. It had a single sail attached to a weathered wooden mast, and two paddles that were chipped from decades of use. Without a glance over his shoulder he stepped into the small sailboat and began to paddle out to sea. He may only be a few months short of seven, but he knew the sea like none other.

Except this time he was alone as he sailed out to sea. No father to smile proudly, no brother to share his joy of the open water. Just him and the deep blue, the only thing that never seemed to change.

~o0o~

The ocean roared as the waves stood as high as the clouds and the lighting illuminated the thundering sky. Killian clung to the mast of the sailboat, holding on for dear life as the little boat desperately tried to stay afloat. He had wanted to head towards the island a day's sail from home, but a storm had come without warning and now he was so sure that he would surely drown.

The tallest wave he had ever seen tumbled towards him and he could do was watch in horror. He remembered his body being flung overboard, and his lungs burning with fire as the water threatened to drag him under.

~o0o~

Killian shivered and spluttered as he awoke. His body trembled as he laid upon the golden sand.

Wait, sand?

He was alive?

He was about to get his bearings when he realised he wasn't alone.

"You were a fool to go out by yourself."

He sat up, dusting the sand from his hair, then turned to find a woman sitting cross-legged beside him wearing a rather stern expression.

"Who are you?" Killian asked, slowly sitting up.

"It doesn't matter," she said softly with a tone of finality.

Killian rubbed his eyes that were stinging from the salt water. His body was covered in sand and his throat was aching. But he could put up with it because he was alive, and that was what really mattered. He gazed over the strange woman. Her hair was golden like the sun, her blue-green eyes mesmerising, even as they glared at him, and her beauty was unlike anything he had ever seen before. In her presence he felt warm, like an aura that seemed to envelope him and keep him from the brisk breeze.

She quirked a brow up as he stared at her, which was enough to snap him out of his stupor.

"Where am I?"

"This place? It's a popular place where pirates and sailors alike are marooned," she said, looking around the small island that was peppered with a few palm trees. "Fortunately for you, this is a frequently used route for passing ships. Just remember to flag down a ship with the king's colours, or you could get yourself into a spot of trouble."

Killian nodded. He could hardly believe his fortune. He was so sure that he would've never woken up after falling overboard and being pulled beneath the surface. But that in itself raised other questions, ones that he hoped his new companion would answer.

"How am I alive?"

"Full of questions aren't you? Well, simply enough, I saved you."

"How…?" His brow furrowed in confusion.

"The storm currents are hardly an issue for me. In fact, the storms are rather refreshing. Though the merfolk can get a little disgruntled about structural damage," she said with an exasperated sigh.

"Mermaids!? They're real?"

"Of course they're real. They don't really come to the surface anymore. A long story that ended quite tragically," she said with a frown.

Killian nodded, but his mind was still buzzing with questions. He so desperately wanted to know who his saviour was. How had she saved him? Before he could ask again she began to speak.

"You were so terribly off course. From the island that you were heading for I mean," she said, looking out to the open sea. "Tell me, why did you leave home?"

"Because there's nothing. Father's gone, my brother is never around. Everyone's forgotten me," he said sadly.

"I'm sure that's not true."

"How would you know?" He said with a huff of disbelief.

"Well, your brother works every day at the docks, trying to learn all he can about ships so that one day he could work as a sailor," she told him. "He wants the best for you. He wants to give you what your father cannot."

"Really?" He asked, his anger fading away, and suddenly feeling very guilty. All those times he thought that his brother didn't care about him anymore, he now realised that Liam was just trying to do what he could to look after them. "I just wish that they didn't take father away. I just want everything to go back to the way it was."

"I know, but there are some things you cannot change simply because it isn't in your power. Sometimes you just have to move on." she said, turning away to look at to sea. "Even when you are hoping that things might turn out the way you want them to if you just wait. Time doesn't always solve all your problems." She turned back to look at him, giving him a small smile.

"But I don't know what to do," he said softly, fidgeting with his hands.

"You have to decide what to do for yourself, because it is your life and only you can choose what to do with it," she reminded him gently.

"I suppose you're right."

"Of course I am," she said with a smirk. "You're not the first lost soul I've come across and you'll certainly not be the last."

Killian frowned. "You still never told me who you are."

"No I didn't, did I?" She said.

"How did you know I was going to drown?"

"I watch over you, as I do all things in these waters. Usually I do not interfere with the will of the waters. If the ocean decides to claim the souls of man, then who am I to judge? But it was not your time to die," she told him. " -many times I've watched your family sail upon these seas, calming the waves so you make the journey in peace. But this is the first time in many years that I have appeared to another in this form, the previous, your father."

"You knew my father?"

"Aye I did. Once an honest sailor and one that I had come to admire. He could navigate the oceans as if he could command the tides. I came to him once when his ship came under attack by a pirate raid. He found himself floating among the remains of his fleet, and the floating forms of his comrades. Yet he never gave up, trusting in the sea to bring him ashore. And so it did, for few truly have the faith anymore."

"I don't understand," he said, his brows knitted together in confusion.

The woman sighed. "And he never spoke of me. I suppose that is understandable," she mumbled to herself.

"I am Calypso, Nymph of Water, Ocean and Seas. But to you, I am the one who bore you," she said.

"Bore me?"

"Child, you and your brother are my sons, my only true sons. Your father and I, he was kind, he believed in my power. He believed in the old magic, a belief that has been slowly dying these past decades. I have been so very alone. My water sisters have faded into nothing, for there was no one to believe in them. The only kin that remain untouched is the fae, but even they have chosen to live in seclusion, only rarely coming in contact with those outside their world. You see, the world is changing Killian, the tides are changing. I fear that my time in this world is nearing the end," she said.

"You're...my mother?" He asked, eyes wide and body still from shock.

"Aye. Forgive my absence. As a nymph, it is simply not in my nature to stay. I must go where the tide-"

"I thought you were dead!" Killian snapped suddenly, his shock having slowly morphed into anger. "Brother and I have been alone...and you've been here the whole time! You could've cared for us! Brother wouldn't have to be away all the time."

Killian couldn't hold back the tears that came. Whether they were from his anger, or his own grief, he did not know for sure. All he knew was that this woman…this creature was his mother, the mother he thought was dead and would never meet.

The mother that should have been with them all these years.

Did she not know that he needed her? He didn't care if she was this mythical creature. All he wanted was for someone to be there, to rescue him from this life that seemed so bleak.

"You do not understand child. I am not like you. I am not human, nor mortal. The ocean commands me as I command it. It is a part of me that I cannot let go of. To ignore my nature, is to deny my very self. It would be like taking away your personality, your ideas, your capacity to think. You are simply nothing without it," she explained softly, though deep within her a part of her soul ached for the child's anguish.

"Then you cannot help me."

"Have I not from saving you this day?"

"It doesn't matter. If I go home everything will be the same," he said, crossing his arms angrily.

"And that is where you are wrong. I have given you a second chance. A reminder that you are still young and your life is only just beginning. I want you to return to your home and cease your longing for a time that has passed. You must think of the future, and where you want to be, rather than the past and where you used to be," she said, turning her head and looking out to sea. "And so fortune is yours once more. A sailing boat is passing. You can choose to signal them, or let them pass. It is your decision, as it always has been."

Killian looked out past the horizon and saw that she was right. He could make out the faint outline of white sails that were slowly growing closer. "I...I want to live," he declared, turning his head back to her, only to find that she was gone. "Where did you go!?" He called out, standing up but knowing she couldn't have moved without him noticing. A wave that was larger than its predecessors rolled onto the sand, water dampening his shoes and reminding him of the passing sailboat. "Oh yeah," he added.

~o0o~

He had managed to signal the boat by yelling and waving his arms manically. He was lucky that his words had not been caught in the wind, as the storm seemed to have passed over and left the ocean calm in its wake. The captain of the ship had agreed to take him back to shore, but not after asking how a young boy managed to get himself marooned. Killian simply said that it was a long story.

When he arrived home he was greeted with a rather furious older brother who threatened to beat him for everything Killian had put him through. But Killian could forgive him, and was reminded that his brother had suffered far greater for their father's absence. He was just glad that he was home, and that even if he was lonely at times, he still had Liam and he told himself that that was enough.

Despite his mishap during that one stormy day, he continued to sail out onto open water. He crafted himself a raft and would fish during the day. What catch that he and Liam did not eat could be sold. Soon he could afford a small sailboat and could make the journey out to that island that had changed him.

There he would find the Nymph waiting, her ethereal smile bright and warm, and her words of wisdom giving him the courage to return home after every visit and face the world.

After many years as a fisherman, he and Liam were old enough to join the Navy, wanting to live an honest life and become good men. Killian's visits to his mother had grown infrequent during those years, where he did his duty to king and country, and rarely had time to isolate himself to speak with his mother. Still, on those few visits that he did manage to make, she would praise him for becoming a young man she could be proud of, and was glad that he made time to visit her despite his busy life. It was during these days that Killian began to notice that her form was beginning to change. She didn't not seem as bright. Her aura seemed to lack it's warmth. But he was not brave enough to inquire, because he didn't want to know the reason why it was happening. He didn't think he was going to like the answers to his many questions.

Killian could recall the day he arrived in Neverland. That fateful day where Liam fell to the accursed Dreamshade. His brother only wanted to reassure him that their king meant no ill will. Liam only wanted him to believe that everything was going to be okay. But he was so gravely mistaken, and there was nothing he could do to save the one person that had never done him wrong. Liam died and no brave face and no reassuring speech to himself in the mirror could bring him back. Killian had never told his brother of their supernatural mother. Many times he had wanted to. Liam deserved to know as much as he had. But he had been afraid that his brother would not believe him. His brother did not believe in faeries and mermaids. He was afraid that if Liam thought he was insane, he would send him away. Send him far, far away from the sea, from his mother. The day Liam died he had never felt more guilty. Liam had always been brave, and had always looked after himself and Killian. But didn't every child deserve to know their mother, even if he didn't think he needed her? Killian knew he could never be as strong as Liam. He had been selfish and kept his mother all to himself. Maybe if Killian had made him see, he would've been more trusting of him. Maybe Liam would've listened to him when he said that the king would use the Dreamshade for evil intentions.

But it was too late now, and with his brother's cold body lying in his arms. the least he could do was send him to his watery grave. Maybe there Liam could finally meet their mother. She could watch over him for eternity.

~o0o~

Aboard the Jolly Roger, Killian was no longer the honest man he once set out to be. He was the infamous pirate that plundered and robbed the seven seas of all it's riches. He had not been to the island to speak with his mother for years. He knew that she would be ashamed, and he did not want to see her eternally beautiful face look upon him in disappointment. He didn't know if he could ever be ready for that confrontation. But despite his grievances, he missed her terribly. She was all he had left.

~o0o~

He heard the whispers among the sea-folk. The kin of old magic were fading and their power over the seas had dwindled. Great storms tore through their kingdoms, and tall waves crashed against the shore, shattering the cliffs and destroying coastal nations.

For the first time in decades he boarded his small sailboat and battled the roaring waves, desperate to find his island that he had ignored for far too long. No longer was he the inexperienced child that had almost been lost in a storm. He had seen many storms and faced waves as high as mountains. He had mastered the seas and knew its motions unlike any other.

He jumped out of his childhood sailboat and landed on the sand, calling out for the water nymph over the roaring wind and the snarling seas. 'Calypso, Water Nymph, Mother.' Yet she failed to appear, and the rain only seemed to pound harder against his sun-tanned skin. Was she angry at him for not returning? Was this his punishment for abandoning her after everything she had done for him?

"Mother! I'm sorry!" He cried out into the grey heavens above. "Forgive me. Forgive me for my absence, for the wrongs I have done. For sending Liam to you far too soon. Please, just show yourself to me!"

The thunder clapped and lightning ignited across the sky. Was this his mother's fury?

"Please, just come back to me. I don't want to be alone anymore," he said, his voicing become a whisper as he fell to the damp sand, his body shuddering as he prayed for a sign.

"Why do you come to me now after all these years?" He heard finally. He looked up to see that a wave had come further ashore, and from it a wispy apparition in the form of his mother hovered above it.

"I thought...I thought that you were gone. The Mer spoke of the disappearances of creatures like you. I was afraid you were gone and I was too late to make amends," he said, relief washing over him. She was still here. He was not alone after all.

"So only when I fade away do you bless me with your presence," she said, her face remaining impassive though he knew that she was greatly displeased with him.

"I'm sorry. I should have come sooner."

"Your apologies cannot change the past. You were afraid of what I thought of you, now that your life has changed it's course."

"Aye. You were always the one to believe in me. I have let you down. I did not want to hear you say it. Believe me mother, I knew it," he said, his eyes filled with grief.

"So now what? You expect me to fix everything. No child. Your life is your own, as it always has been. Amend it yourself. Alter your course. Do what you need to do to better yourself as you have done in the past," she told him sternly.

"But I do not know how."

"Nor do I. I do not have all the answers. You must find it yourself."

"Where do I start? Please mother."

"The sea has always granted you shelter. And it will do so for as long as you accept it's nature. The ocean is unpredictable, but if you are wise and true, you will find your way through the greatest of storms," she said, her tone softening. "Now go. You will catch your death in this weather. I cannot protect you any longer from these wild winds. You must be patient as with all things in life. Keep yourself safe, and those you care for. You will find that in time you will understand the importance in my words."

The wispy form of his mother began to fade, like a mist that was clearing after a gust of wind.

Killian desperately stumbled towards her, but her ghostly form could not be grasped. "Wait! Will I ever see you again?" He cried.

She gave him a small, sad smile.

"No."

~o0o~

He sat upon the shoreline of the little town in Maine. So much had happened these past few years. He had lost and found love so many times that it hurt his brain just thinking about it.

Emma Swan, the saviour, his saviour, the woman that now held his affections. She had given him reason, purpose, and something to fight for.

This odd little town was more than he could have ever imagined. He was so far from home, but he had never felt more alive. He was free from his past misdeeds, and knew that he was on the road to redemption.

Something caught his eye; a small object has washed upon the shore. He stood and walked over to investigate, then found himself picking up a cream coloured conch. It was odd finding the shell on Storybrooke's shore. The last one he had encountered was on the pristine beaches of the Caribbean. He tipped it, letting the sand and salt water pour out onto the beach below.

He recalled his father telling him once that you could hear the ocean within a shell. But back then he was a gullible child that believed everything he was told. Liam had certainly thought that the entire notion of it was childish and stupid. But one thing that his experiences with Swan and her rather complicated family had taught him was that one of the most powerful things in this world was to believe.

So he brought the shell to his ear, and he closed his eyes, listening to the sounds of the wind and waves that the conch contained. Then he heard something else, and he looked around to see if someone was calling his name, but he was alone on the beach.

' _Killian.'_

_'Forgive me for being away for so long.'_

Killian stood there in disbelief. The conch was still held to his ear and the voice was unmistakably the one that belonged to his Water Nymph mother. The one who he thought had faded that day on the island during the storm.

"I thought you said I would never see you again," he murmured.

_'Aye, I said 'see' didn't I?_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. I've decided to focus on one shots for 2015, while finishing off the chapter fiction work in the next month or so. Profile will have more details.
> 
> Note 1: The reference Calypso makes "They don't really come to the surface anymore. A long story that ended quite tragically," is based on The Little Mermaid, Ariel's Beginning where a ship crashed into her mother and killed her.
> 
> Note 2: I wasn't aware of the already established theory of Davy Jones and Calypso being Killian's parents, and I haven't read any fiction that contain this theory, so any similarities are simply coincidence.


End file.
